Just as you’re taking great care to teach all the core curriculum subjects in your homeschool—spending hours reviewing courses, planning activities, and preparing for the new school year—you may even go the extra mile to incorporate life skills. But let me ask: Are you intentionally planning to teach your kids social and emotional skills?
As a clinical psychologist, I was well aware of the importance of teaching my children how to manage emotions like frustration and anxiety. I was constantly reminded of the need to teach my kids conflict resolution and how to build healthy friendships during homeschool activities. But in the busyness of daily life and academic instruction, I wasn’t intentional about teaching these critical skills. That’s something I regret—and want to help you avoid.
1. Social and Emotional Skills Are Vital for Academic and Life Success
You may believe academics are more important than teaching emotional or relational skills, but here’s the truth: most students who struggle in high school or college do so because of anxiety, depression, or interpersonal challenges—not a lack of academic preparation.
Social and emotional learning (SEL) includes essential skills like learning how to focus, regulate emotions, and initiate tasks—skills that dramatically impact academic performance. Beyond that, emotional intelligence is one of the most sought-after traits in today’s workforce. A highly intelligent student who is socially awkward or anxious in a scholarship interview is less likely to succeed than a moderately gifted student who communicates well and handles pressure.
Poor social-emotional skills don’t just impact academics or jobs—they affect long-term relationships. Students who can’t manage frustration, recognize nonverbal cues, or handle authority figures respectfully may struggle in marriage, parenting, and the workplace.
2. These Skills Aren’t Just “Caught”—They Must Be Taught
Some social and emotional skills are learned naturally—like saying hello to visitors or showing politeness during meals. But many aren’t. Skills like managing anxiety, dealing with frustration, and coping with clutter-related stress are rarely taught explicitly in most homeschools.
In my years as a clinical psychologist, I repeatedly taught these same emotional and social skills to clients of all ages—often at over $100 an hour. I couldn’t help but think: Why weren’t these skills taught when they were younger?
We might touch on worry during a Bible lesson or talk about frustration in the heat of a moment, but unless we make these skills a regular part of instruction, they’ll likely be missed. And truthfully, many parents avoid teaching these topics because they struggle with them too. But if we don’t address these issues in childhood, helping kids overcome them later becomes more difficult—and more painful.
3. Intentional SEL Prevents Shame and Builds Close Relationships
Another reason to teach social and emotional skills in a structured way is to prevent kids who are struggling from feeling singled out. Whether your child is on the autism spectrum, has ADHD, or is simply immature in their social development, the last thing they need is to feel like “the problem child.”
When we say, “Johnny, it’s time for your social skills lesson,” while other kids aren’t participating, we risk shaming that child. They may resist learning simply to protect their self-esteem. But when SEL is part of your whole-family curriculum, every child benefits—and no one feels “broken.”
In fact, children using my Training Aliens social and emotional skills curriculum have come to love these lessons. They laugh, engage, and even beg to do more. They don’t feel called out—they feel called in. When SEL is framed as a fun, family experience, even the most reluctant learners grow in confidence and skill.
Conclusion: Give Your Kids a Head Start That Goes Beyond Academics
Being intentional about teaching social and emotional skills doesn’t just set your kids up for academic success—it lays the foundation for a healthy, happy life.
Yes, your children will learn a lot through observation and experience. But we can do better. We can be proactive. We can equip them with the tools they need to face life’s challenges with wisdom and strength.
Let’s not leave these vital skills to chance. Let’s make them part of our homeschool legacy.
Be sure to read the next post in the series here.
